The Virus Of saying "sorry"

There is a virus spreading..... queue scary music. It isn't some sweet ass kicking virus that eats your solar Plexes or something awesome like that either. It also isn't a sweet movie involving Jamie lee Curtis (All three of that broads names are MALE names) ((AND I WOULD STILL THROW A BONE IN HER!) Ok this all startd when I went to subway a couple weeks ago. This dude kept on saying he is sorry because my sandwhich was too messy. I finally said dude, it's ok, I understand my sandwhich is going to be messy because I ordered triple everything Bacon, Cheese, ham, meatballs, Zebracakes, oreo's, (but hold the pickles thanks!) I realized right then people say they are sorry for everything. BE A MAN FOR AND ONLY SAY YOU ARE SORRY FOR THINGS YOU ARE SORRY FOR. Like falling down vinnies steps and spilling Jim Beam everywhere, and Voting for Obama. Those things yu can truely feel sorry for. YOU KNOW WHAT? THE VALUE IN YOUR "SORRY" IS MAXIMIZED if you use it less. Just like the Value in saying "I LOVE YOU" to a woman should only be used as currency to attain MAX VALUE. (like before intercourse and recieving breakfest handies at perkins.)

What Women want?

Who cares? I man has to be on his path to awesomeness, so when girls are like "Oh Ray you should...I just pull out a construction sign that says "Caution! Awesome at play" Then I go back to constructing Awesome like 300 k-dot workers high on Meth. Then when I stack 7 shades of awesome on top of each other I tip it over creating a avalanche of awesome. Some people try to skii on MT. AWESOME, but I would advice against it. Although you do get a special rate being the offseason of awesome, you don't get the full amount of awesome.

Alright...here is your Manual just don't kill us!

When you are going over to talk to a bunch of girls, or you are going on stage for being funny. This is a perfect story that tells what your brain does (I heard it somewhere else but it is so true it is funny). Your brain already has the manual of how to communicate with girls, be funny, or learn or whatever, you just have to go do it before it unlocks that ability. Sooo in your mind it is like two dudes just going to the airport. The first guy is like lets get in a plane! Second guy is like why the F would we do that, we are sitting here in the cafe at the airport! So they go out to the plane. The first guy is like I am flying this son of a bitch, I don't care if you like it or not! The second guy says No you aren't not without the flying manual. The second dude is wearing some suspenders or something stupid. He is a dork and won't give the first guy the plane manuel So The first guy is like well whatever we are flying this bitch right now! They take off and the second guy wets his pants (possibly shitting them) then he finally says "Here is your stupid flying manual just don't get us killed"

so you see this lesson can be applyed to anything, public speaking, taking off a bra, whatever your heart desires. Your brain often has the Manual already in your head) On a side note I keep typing Manuel... which is a good name for someone who speaks spanish.

Natural Pecking Order (and how it's not bad!)

Ok no matter how hard I try, Vinnie is going to be higher on the pecking order. This is a good thing, it's like nature or something, we show up somewhere I turn to him to see what the hell he is going to do, so I get a sense of how the envirement is going to react. So I used to get all OH MAN I AM GOING TO SHOW UP AND KICK EVERYONE FACE WITH MY AWESOMENESS. Now I figure I can calibrate to what he does. Just like an alpha Male dog will eat a hot dog first to make sure the hot dog is safe for the group o eat, Vinnie will eat the delicious meat. He does get the large part of the meat, but there is that chance that the hot dog fell on the floor at Wileys. So with that I will say that whenever writes a blog I must Write a blog too. He just makes me better.

08/10/10 Randoms

I am starting to watch LOST. the hit show about people who are lost. Episode 1 season 1. A plane crashed. There is some talking.


I like to reframe my life to make sure I get maximum amount of enjoyment. Instead of Gawsh I have 2 hours left in the work day. I am like 2 more hour of being in my twenties woooo hooo

Strict rules

My sister wants me to go to Worlds of fun, but everyone should know my rule about amusement parks by now. I require written documentation of a Saftey inspected Tilt-a-whirl on the premises with less than a 13 minunte wait...and that is just to get your foot in the door with me.

Saturday 08/07/10

The guy fixing my water heater just walked in while I was watching "bring it on" and I wasn't even embarrassed