Ireland pt2

Today started out with Crabtree driving like the people in "the italian job" he was working the wheel like 4 time winston cup champion Jeff Gordon. We saw some meth head chicks over here and my thought process went like this

Whow those girls look like they are on drugs they are so skinny, I bet they will SMD for 5 dollars, but I would rather see them eating a bananna.

The Cab Driver was like thats the hotel U2 owns and I then asked what hotel Thin Lizzy owns. He said no no Thin Lizzy has been gone along time.

Comedy Wrapup

I decided to give my gift back to the world, which is the gift of laughter. Exept most people don't wish to accept my gift. I open mic'd at the vous in St. Joseph. that was fun because St. Joseph Jokes are in my DNA. Trading 6-pack and a pound for blockbuster "old" rentals. Joking about that stuff is awesome. I am def getting used to the grind and the routine (pun intended) of doing comedy. The first months the day I was planning on getting in front of people I felt sick all day, now I just feel semi sick. Ok then I went out to Mingle in Lee Summit and did comedy. That was fun. A dude named Del Iliff really grinds to make shows happen. He is getting really good at comedy. Tuesday I did open mic at Standfords and I got crushed, haha that is apart of the deal is sometimes people aren't going to think you are funny. I have to give it up for Mike Porkenoy. Hard working comedy guy. This one dude Brennan? I dunno this one dude crushed. It's hard to believe this but sometimes when you don't want to get on the Mic because you are tired or whateve, well when you have a gift like that dude has, it's not about you. It's about sharing your gift. Which most the times Sharing a gift is giving herpies, or my gift to ho's is slappin them.

Aug 11th

So I attended an event called the 11th annual Softball chili cookoff, but it should have been called the 1st annual Lesbian Fartoff. I was wearning my IPOD ear buds, not with anything playing because I don't actually own a IPOD, I can't afford that shit, just the earbuds, just enough so I can ignore people. Anyway I leaned over to get some chili and one of my earbuds fell into the chili. Now I don't know how much crap fro my ear fell into the chili, but I know exactly how much chili went back into my ear when I put the earbuds back in.

History of my Video games

Ahhhh my love for video games goes back along way. My earliest memories with the ole golden joystick (like a video game joystick not my penis) is using a phone looking device playing the smurfs video game. Little known fact is that Smurfs was a french comic book. How do you get baby smurfs? Well you pull them out of smurfette of course. Some crazy things going down in smurfville or whereever the smurfs are from. I love Mad Men, John Hamm is one funny dude. I am listening to a podcast called "the nerdist" funny stuff. I think my dog is about ready to die, which sucks, but that is what dogs and old people do. Dang it...blue was old...and that's what happens to old people do. That is a famous quote from the hit movie OLD SCHOOL. Ok back to video games. My first video game system was a coleco vision, which came with an attachment to play atari 2600 games on. That is CARAZZZY by todays standards. It is the equivilant of your gamecube being able to play playstation 2 games. I don't know why I didn't use playstation 3 and xbox 360 for that last comparison, probably because I have an unhealthy love affair with gamecubes.

Once Driller Always a Driller...hector

This quote cracks me up for some reason. Today I woke up feeling good. I have had long days of work and meeting up with the people reading the bible and the AA book. I also had to write out the stuff I am scared of. So here is some of the random shit that triggers my fears

When people are reading a book out loud in a class or a meeting and they need me to read. I am afraid I won't know my place and I will have to ask someone and everyone will think I am some kind of moron.

Scared of Heights
Girls named sarah that don't put the H at the end is scary.
Scared of working in a cubicle the rest of my life
scared of propellers of any kind.
Scared of dropping babies or puppies (cats seem to do fine when I drop them)
Ray Lewis of the baltimore ravens scares me.
Scared of falling off the escilator on Kauffman staduim. This escalator is 30 stories up and it always has drunk people falling into me. It's always windy. and it's a fucking escalator! Thats more than enough for me to be scared.
Strangly enough I used to be scared of death, but now I know that it mostly out of my hands...which brings me to this. I had a dream about Long John silvers yesterday. Man I want a hushpuppy.

I hope you know this will go down on your perm record

Violent Femmes on the cd player today. Ummm I really think they suck, but I listen to them anyway because it's easy to sing along. Crabtree is going to 30 seconds to mars. Which Jared Leto is the lead singer. Jared Leto was so dreamy in "my so called life" Sooo Dreamy. I have been writing punch lines without a story to go with them. So here is one

The fact that she was humming on my balls like a World War I Bi-Plane wasn't disburbing, but the fact that she was wearing a scarf and goggles like the red baron was.

The commercial on the radio for 7 up with David Spade in it is mildly Entertaining. Listened to the beastie boys today. They are old as hell. Someone is eating BBQ around me.

More will be told

There was this lady who I met back in april, I thought she blabbed way too much. Over the last couple weeks of trying to serve instead of being served more has been told to me. It has been pretty fun, instead of listening to this lady and blab I have learned and been entertained. The gist of it is she has had a pretty wild life and like most people she has been through more than I will ever understand. I can't believe how people go through so much on one side of their life, but still are able to aquire lots of power, then loose it, then gain it back. The moral is put yourself in someone elses shoes if for nothing else it helps you get out of yours for awhile.
I know how in depth after doing inventory of the problems I have, that the smallest things do hurt people. I try to keep my side of the street and not call people short or shit like that, because I know it stays with people sometimes forever. Is it big deal? No, but it keeps myself from being free. I know even when a bully pulls off my pants at a christmas party, I later or before that I did something to get back at him. Like make jokes that he wouldn't understand.

I can have everyone like me exept for one person, and I must make that person like me. I am working on making that better by putting a higher power #1 instead of that person. Most the time it is a chick, but it can be anyone.