lifting weights

I have a love hate girlfriend, her name is Deep Squats. If you were on a desert island and you had one excersize to do, it would be the deep squat. That would be a messed up island for sure, I am not sure why you would only be able to do one exersize, maybe the island natives would hold spears to your neck and the only things you could do is watch reruns of "the love boat" and do one Lift of your choice. Anyway, I have been lifting weights the last couple of weeks, one thing is for sure, if you want to really pay the price and show your dedication, this lift is for you. It sucks, you can't really show off to the ladies your work, actually lifting is more for the guys anyway, woman really want to see your abs, your paycheck, your ability to defend your house, and your ability to impress her friends. Anyway I digress. Ok so I have been doing some squats and they really suck, the challenge is to do them correctly, then be able to function the rest of the day. Henry Rollins said that he used to love leg day, it seperates the weightlifters from the frat guys. He used a wheel chair to get into his house after leg day. I quit lifting weights because I was resentful that there was no point to it anymore, I didn't have to play football why lift weights? I thought, now I know why I can lift weights, because it keeps my mind occupied, it is a challenge, and it makes me feel good just talking about it. That is why I do it. I am willing to accept things that I was not able to accept a couple years ago. Now I can handle people whispering "This guy loves to work out, but he his man boobs and looks like crap what gives?" what gives is that I love to eat 13 bags of funyons and workout, that makes me feel good the entire day.

Edit, just did 50 leg lifts at 10:01 am today.

April 10th

Hmm what to do, 8 am. Play drums or video games. I decided to watch some youtube videos and put the recordings of the beats on my mp3 player. Didn't want to overload my practice so I just put a couple simple beats. 8/8 with simple fill and swiss army rudiments. Pretty Hip huh?

Drumming is cool

Just like blogging, you have to practice instruments everyday to get better. I have been playing some drums, watching videos, just basicly thinking about upping my drumming chops. A true labor of love that is. Learning a new instrument is pretty easy if you have a ton of time on your hands like during college, it is a major pain in the ass if you have to drag your ass to work every day, and do recovery meetings, with recovery homework. Anyway blogging and writing about my life is more fun when I look back at it and see that I played an instrument for an hour each day.

04/06/11

Starting out the day, I like to brew hot tea in a small cup, and have some ice and water in another large cup. I take the brewed really dark black tea and pour it into the cup with the ice and water. Pretty normal, so I am talking to my buddy LC while carrying the cups today. Exept for the smaller cup was insanely hot.

"alright ray you got this just alittle further, or maybe if LC goes further he won't see me throw this cup of fire on the ground"


Lc then started talking to me about the Royals. I was screwed. I put the cup down and flailed my arms around because I was sure my right hand was charred" He had a good laugh. Then asked me why I drink so much tea.

Go Royals

Listing out what makes me happy and satisfied

Well. I think it is time to blog about what I actually like. I can drive home, when I am making myself miserable...what I can do to make it better. Today I feel great, I actually have some peace. It is nice out and I wish everyone could have the ahhhhhh everything is cool feeling I have right now! I think this is all due to Double Dragon 2. Yesterday I was feeling alittle down, I decided... that action needed to be done. I needed to punch Ninja's in the face. I have to give myself credit. I went out and I got it done. Now maybe your game of choice is bad dudes. Mine is Double Dragon. One dragon is pretty sweet, but two dragons is freaking awesome, 3 dragons now you are just getting greedy.

Royal Monday

I have decided to relapse on my addiction the Royals. I sat there and watched 5 hours of the Royals luckily they hit a homerun to win the game. So that was nice, what wasn't nice was how gross I was after sitting in my red chair for so long, plus I ate the delicious candy Hot Tamales and they caused me to sweat. I went out to hang out with bryce and charlie on friday. That was ok, Fridays really suck I am always tired and I empty the clip at work and really have no gas for the rest of the night. I hung out and listened to music on saturday. My neighbor patrick grilled and had people over. He is in a metal band and there were girls that were over there that were amazing looking. Alas I had no real move to make because these dudes that were around looked like they just got out of prison. I lost money on the Uconn game which sucked, the Sporting KC game...well we blew that one. I really tried hard to replace the sucky feeling with something good. Like waking up is sucky, but playing my favorite song is not. So I have been giving myself mental cookies for doing good things. I hope to get back to writing the book soon about tennis, but unfortuately my partner is not doing well. I know I just have to take some action to keep my dream alive, because I know I have good information to give people.

This is going to be an embarrassing post, but here we go.

Alright. So the main pain in my life has always been girls in general. That was my first real drug of choice. I have been doing better lately just living my life and not getting all wrapped up in a few girls that I like. It is just not a skill I have had to step back and realize "that this is just a phase" and we will work with it. I instead make myself feel miserable and always facebook follow ladies I like and torture myself. I know now when I step back that if I take actions like hang around girls I have feelings for, but they don't like me back, that is going to 100% hurt my mental health. I can save this pain if I take action by getting out of that situation. If I don't I don't beat myself up, I just have to reconize that this was caused me by me. I don't take anything too serious anymore so it's all good. I just wish that I could help some young guy out there realize that there are specific actions you can take to make yourself happy, and specific actions you can take to make yourself miserable. If you choose to hover around a girl that doesn't like you back...well welcome to the jungle baby. enjoy being miserable.