Wednesday

I played video games today. I worked on my serve in tennis. It was very cold. I went to work and it was o.k. I came home and the apartment was goo free for the second day in a row. My mom won money awesome. I should get my money back from the state and federal government decently soon. I watch Manchester United. I made a video for chiefs planet. I also made a video for instagram. Instagram and youtube has entertained me. I always wanted to make T.V. shows even if it was just for me. I read lots of things on sober recovery. I post more there to give back what I know. I don't know too much but I know I can at-least tell people how to be sober 4 years.

Wednesday

Yesterday Jason told me that I left goo on the top of the fridge and I almost broke his vacuum. I didn't take it personally and I told him I appreciated the coaching. I am lucky to have him since he dresses well and doesn't leave goo on the top of the fridge. This week has been o.k. I was able to bully myself into cleaning my car and going to an AA meeting yesterday. I am still trying to make money and raise my standards each day. I worked on my tennis game a bit yesterday and a bit today. I will get better so when the weather is nice out I am not embarrassing.

Tuesday

I am 80th in my company this month so far. That is kind of poopy but there is lots of time to go. That is also still in the bonus. I went to work today and I found out I had a half of day scheduled. I came home and bullied myself into cleaning my car, cleaning and washing my sheets, making chicken, and asking a girl out at aldi's. I also practiced my service in tennis. Overall grade for today was a B. Yesterday I got my taxes done. Go me.

Saturday

Saturday night I went down to Karena's studio. She tooked pictures of me. I felt good being apart of the art scene for once. It was nice to be creative. That is where the juices and my passion really come out. I felt good today. I was pissed that I looked fat in my pictures and that I have man boobs. I know being skinnier is a process. I have to use my mind to tell a good story, I have to use my body to feel good, I have to make my mind focus on a vision and I have to tell a story over and over to keep myself happy.

The Weekend

This last week was pretty sad. I did good at work. Last time I checked I actually rose to 13th for the month of January. It has just been a bummer of late trying to get people to hang out and to laugh. Everything seems to be going towards the depressing side. On the good side it is a good chance for me to really act and smile and be as enthusastic as possible. My job is truly a gift from God. I had a meeting for team captains and I have been accepted to the CEP program which is just the fancy way of saying a leadership program. So I keep going forward. I still have the goal of making 100,000 although I haven't wanted to work lately so that is putting a damper on that goal. I know if I stick close to God and help others my needs will be filled. Just not my wants. I really listen to Tony Robbins and that helps me either take action when my emotions are crap or change the way I look at things. Like I was saying this week was tough but I can look at it as a challenge and a new way of using my body and mind to be positive. On Friday especially I reached out and I was like man I need help being positive and moving forward. I acted from that moment on and I survived the day. On Thursday I met up with Raymond and he is doing well. He has his raquet ball equipment and he said he is going to start playing raquetball haha. Hope he doesn't get hurt. My parents are on a cruise and boy have they earned some r and r. Hope they are having fun right now!

1 year anniverery

Today marks the one years that I have worked at my new job. I strive to make more money and learn more. I didn't miss any work this year which is good. I try to prepare for the stuff that may go wrong. I have been feeling a bit down. I try to reach out and keep moving forward though. I worked out when I didn't want to today. I took myself to the buffet at argosy. I lost about 40 bucks but I had fun. I am glad I am sober today. 4 years ago on January I took 4 days off from work and drank all day the last two times. I remember the last day just being so sick and tired. My down days this time don't involve drinking, they just involve donuts and driving around waiting for the day to be over. I asked this girl out a couple days back Anna. She said she had a boyfriend. I was a bit mad, but I am grateful I have the guts to ask girls out.

Superbowl Sunday

Today I woke up in an bad mood. I have a cold and I am sore. I drove around a bit. I made a couple instagram videos. I tried to listen to Tony Robbins tape. I picked up a new tony robbins tape that I am trying to brain wash myself with. It is about being clear with a vision for yourself and taking actions towards those. I want a billion dollars more ladies in my life and to give back more. Pretty simple.

I was the #1 person on my team this month and I was #30 overall in the company. I will take pride and satisfaction with the results and the fruits of my hard work. I don't really feel anything towards that. I do feel good that I asked my buddy travis...who is a guru of social media how do I make instigram videos. From there I have had lots of fun making videos about work, working out, and motivation. I am grateful to live in a time where you don't need to be famous to make videos and get them out to people. My parents are going on vacation. Hope they have a great time. I am blessed to be sober, blessed with a good family, blessed with jason and sarah.

I found a decent way to talk to woman at the gym. I asked what their routine is and then chop it up from there. I am blessed and grateful I have the guts to talk to anyone not only pretty woman. I am blessed that I cultivated my self-confidence to the point that I am not afraid of what people think and I can use this skill to help others get over their fears.