02/12/2016

Today I went down to Lawrence for 3/4 of counseling sessions. It was nice to have someone to talk to that doesn't make things worse. She has some funny stories. I played some farming simulator and brought home some books from my sisters.

02/12/2016

Yesterday I was pretty down day. I didn't want to do anything. I was able to read a bit, watch some informational videos, and watch game of thrones. Even on my worst day I tend to get lots of stuff done. Oh I also watched a little bit of Road House. Here is a video for you. Basically start your day by going all-IN on what you intend to do that day. Stay Hungry, Stay Humble, Stay getting money.

White Hot action

Even though I am not making money. I still have white hot action desire to do well. That is all that matters. Youtube and other videos keep fanning the flames to do well.

2/10/16

Yesterday I got to enjoy a Jayhawks victory. They are getting closer to moving up to the top of the big twelve, but not quite there yet. I have an interview for Home Depot today. I had some anxiety. I always think I know what is going to happen in life. Then it throws me a curve ball. Life is definately a game of tetris and not a game of chess. Back to the money grind. Fees suck. Here is a bit of a reading from my favorite book by Tony Robbins.

02/08/2016

Out of work for awhile. I want to make sure I continue to work out. Look for jobs that are a good fit for me. Also keep reading. I read from the book Master The Money game today. Basically Fees are bad mmmkay. Here is the video blog to go with it.

Looking for a new job.

Yesterday I went to a councilor because I have had severe depression. It hasn't been this bad for awhile. I have hope that if I find a new job that is better for me, that will help with my depression. I also have hope that if I continue to work with doctors I can find an anti-depressant that works. I need to apply at the following places this week.


PUBLIC LIBRARY'S around KC
Missouri Western State University
KU MED
Check into Hotel Management.
Menards.
Then maybe wal-mart or a gas station to get me by. Please Pray that I find the strength to do God's will. Right now it is hard to swallow the fact that my job wasn't working out any longer. I try to focus on the good. That Jason and I made it work for longer than it probably should have and I made it at Alliance Data for 2 years. Please pray I never work at a call center again as well.

I vow to cultivate my resilience and strength through my unemployment. I vow to maintain good spirits. I feel like I am a failure because I couldn't make it work at my job. I know that I am not a failure. Somethings just come to an end. I feel depressed that I have a loss of income. I know that is normal to have depression. Once I start making money again I will feel better, or just having some time pass. I know eventually I will feel better about just making a choice to quit this job and find a new one. That shows some courage and I know that courage is hard to build.

Positives in bad situations

I decided to leave my work because it was too stressful. I feel like I was going to abuse alchohol or drugs if I kept working there. So I took a leap of faith and put in my two-week notice. I was full of fear and sadness. I don't want to lose my car or my good credit. It is out of my hands though. I just need to work on my resume and my cover letter and move forward. People say that I am a good worker so I am sure I will get a chance to prove myself. Some positives to take away is that I have the courage to walk away from something that isn't right for me. I learned a bit how to cope better with the unknown. I was really hit with fear, depression, and worry. I did the best I could to cope with those emotions while still being productive. I always need to stay in Today. That is all anyone has. Whenever my mind pictures me losing something, I just say "Thanks mind" and move on with being productive.