Your brain always tells you lies

My brain always wants to be safe. Whew you did that now you can quit because you are happy. Jamie once told me it like this. The trainers job in boxing is to tell the boxer that the canvas is not safe, it may feel safe, but you aren't safe. The safe place is to get up and keep fighting. Today my brain is like that. It doesn't want to push the limits of what I can do because it says "Whew it is Friday, time to kick it!" I won't believe that garbage, the knowledge that I have that "Just kicking it" is the wrong thing to do is what could make the difference between success and failure. When it all comes down to it I want pleasure or I want to avoid pain, so if I through out all the bullcrap excuses my mind makes up (I am tired, you are happy why ruin today?, what will people think, this person or that person sucks,) when I throw out all the excuses I see that there is a pain I don't want to deal with. I made a deal awhile ago that I would take on some pain to be successful. So today I will push my limits and grow and not listen to the crap my mind tells me. No Excuses play like a champion.

Thursday

Yesterday was pretty good. The thing I reinforced in my brain is that...my brain just wants me to survive. It doesn't care that I have hopes in dreams. If I have enough food and shelter it doesn't want to work harder and push and grow. It is my mission to I don't care what my brain tells me. I am working through this. I don't care how much time is left in the day. It doesn't matter, I have no sense of time, all I have is a sense of urgency to get tasks done and a sense of importance to do them correctly. I really try to keep focused on what I want in life. If trash comes into my brain I refocus on the task on hand, or gratitude, or breathing, or how awesome something is. I do have fun though, I was able to rest and watch some hoops yesterday. I haven't seen much of the NBA this year, but I am sure once football is over I will become obsessed basketball some more. Everything is pretty good, I am healthy and I really get excited about how much I can grow and push day in and day out. I really like to imagine what my legacy will be. I am sure it will be to grow and learn. Then apply what you learn and drop the stuff that doesn't work. I think it would be also don't make excuses period. Also don't listen to your brain, it wants you to quit. Listen to mp3's about your dreams, talk and write about what you want, you can control your thoughts if you write and really use energy to focus on the thoughts you want, so don't waste them. Also my legacy would also place importance on being easy on yourself. If you want to be good you cant waste energy on negative emotions. Sometimes you don't get what you want, and thank God things don't go as planned. Life would be boring that way.

Wednesday

Ben Mclemore is off the chain. He had a windmill dunk at the end of the San Jose State game that was one of those moments in American History where everyone stopped what they are doing and turned their attention to his dunking skills. After Speilburg is doing with his Lincoln move he has promised to to do a move about Ben Mclemore...it is going to called "WINDMILLS" it is about Ben Mclemore's love for windmill dunks. It is going to star Jamie Fox and is due out this march.

Back To basics block

My blog is very much the same crap over and over. That is mostly because I always want to keep it simple. Clean house, trust God, help others. If I was to start somewhere teaching a young man how to live I would make him do small tasks over and over and over until he wanted to not do it anymore, then I would force him to do it correctly and right until he passed out. Then after he woke up I would make him do the small task correctly and do it right some more. There are so many things in my life that I have now because I did the correct things correctly in the past. There are so many things that mean more than holding the trophy. It is doing small task correctly and growing in love for the small tasks. I go a walk on my break to keep the habit of working out going, I take time to really think hard the sacrifice I make to just keep that habit ANCHORED in my behavior. While other people are getting off their diet around this time I am making sacrifices to stick with a decent diet and walking. I am always willing to put in my blood sweat and tears to keep growing, and you know I really don't go through that much pain anymore...maybe some frustration here or there, but the key is I am willing to go through the pain, willing to go through the blood, sweat, and tears to keep going towards my goals in life. I also really try to love the process. The destination is never as sweet as the journey. So I do my best to love the journey. I have never been healthier, or happier than I am now. I let so much of my old crap go. It is hard to remember what a nervous wreck I was just a couple years ago. So I continue to grow and I continue to grow my love of the growing process..

KU game and T-Fitness

The KU game was closer than expected. Ben Mclemore continues to shine with highlight reel type dunks and great defense. Whithy had a triple double. I grew as a person by working together to have a good time. My friend Jason was going with a group of 3. Phil, Clay, and Peter. I had 2 tickets and I just wanted to go by myself because I was tired. Jason asks this fitness model to go with me. A female fitness model I might add. I will call her T-Fitness It is really rough having a fitness model on your arm for great KU tickets, but being the strong man I am I was able to work through tough times. Obviously when you have a great body...an ELITE body.. people just stare. So there I am with T-Fitness watching the game and she was cool. We both cheered and she was quiet which is weird for a woman during a sports game. After the game I was chatting up this girl with red hair. Her name was Katie. I always open up with red headed girls the same "Hey...how's that red hair working for you? Are you sunburned?" She laughed. I was telling her "Stay ready so you don't have to get ready" as I said that Scott Pollard walked by. Sweet. Katie was laughing but I think the security guards were getting mad because she was laughing and not paying attention to her job, before some of the hounds came over to break up me and Katie's fling..T-Fitness came out of the bathroom everyone left us alone and bounced. We had a parking pass to this game because of Phil. Jason hooked up me up and I will try not to bitch about life for awhile because it worked out well this day.

My Sports Update

Missouri Western won their game. I was at ease when I saw what kind of offense the other team played. The other team wanted to spread you out and throw the ball 50 times. I felt good about MO WEST being able to defend that because they are athletic. Our team on defense is more about quickness and ball skills than it is about tackling and stuffing the run. The Griffon QB was on fire and Mo West recievers have been catching everything. Northwest lost which means we play on the road. I would have liked to see one more home game with northwest. That atmosphere is bananas. MO Mavricks seem to be playing better. KU is good in basketball and I think Mizzou is as well, but they lost the game I was watching. Texans look good and Notre Dame is in the championship. Sporting KC hasn't made any moves and Jeremy Guthrie got signed by the royals. Royals need grienke, but the Dogers are going to make it rain money for him.

Saturday

Saturday was one of the better days that I have had for awhile. I was able to come home after thanksgiving and relax and try to focus on things that needed to be done. I was going to give back to poor people this year. PEROID END OF STORY. I had a vision of me really wanting to go after giving back the same way dumbasses go after the IPOD CRAP on black friday. It felt good giving back books and things to color to the families of military people. I also gave away some scarves and hats. That left me with a sort of high feeling know that some kid will cure cancer because he now has a toy story coloring book for christmas. After that I played video games. I really am trying to love video games more because I love video games. I just can't seem to get into them anymore. I am sure that if I think about them more I will start to love them more. At night Adam, Tressa, JP, JJ, Johnathan, and Suuze went out dancing and we had fun. I got a number from some girls just for fun. One thing I have going for when I go out is my "Give a care" meter is always down. I have been around enough people that some people may call me "awesome" some people might call me "AN FREAKING IDIOT" it doesn't really change my life. I still put my funyons in my mouth like everyone else does.