220 I am at 220 which means I have to lose 3 pounds by saturday to get to my one pound a week lost goal. I felt like shit monday and tuesday so it would be nice to at-least get back to the 218 I was last week.

05/21/19

I have been trying to lose a pound per week I was at 218 last saturday and I weighed myself today and I was 220 so that was a step backwards. I lifted pretty hard last week and I may have put on some muscle but man I felt like shit Sun MON Tuesday. So when I feel like shit I eat a bunch of crap to keep my mood halfway decent. So hopefully I can lose 3 pounds by saturday so I can keep on my goal pace.

05/06/

Sporting KC sucks dick right now. Everyone is hurt and the people are playing they suck. I went down to watch them on a beautiful night in KCK. Man I love being at that pitch and watching grown men kick a ball around. Hopefully they can turn it around next week. Saturday I worked on working out and that is about it. My dad has someone mow the yard and I had free time to go for a long walk in the afternoon and at night. I think that at-least got me even with my weight on Sunday as I had some cashews and other bullshit.

05/03/

Yesterdays interpol concert was good. It was just below mind blowing. The light show was better than expected. Today I got in a bit of a dust up with a dump truck he pulled to the side like he was parking then I guess I was supposed to know he wanted to turn left. Anyway I ususally would freak out about an almost accident but progress and faith and non fear I didn't freak out too badly. This gives me hope little by little that my overall happiness goes up. I got sporting kc this weekend on retro night and I will miss game of thrones next week I got 4 days off because they are working on our power at work.

04/30

I felt pretty good today. I was able to walk a bit which is nice. Sometimes I don't get to walk a couple days in a row because I feel like shit. I try to will myself into doing stuff but that doesn't work all the time. Tomorrow I go to KC for AA. It kinda sucks but it is nice going to the sporting game and being able to drive home and not throw up and get in trouble and then I can go home and play video games or whatever. So not drinking is awesome especially if you watch people in the 30's drink at sports events. You know they will be hurting the next day.

04/29

This weekend I felt pretty good. I went to sporting kc. Sporting kc is in a slump and have tons of injuries. On Sunday I went to Bar K to look at dogs. It was amazing.

04/26

Tomorrow Sporting KC plays. It should be a good bounce back game for them. I walked 2.5 miles today but probably cancelled that out by eating a shit ton. I am getting better at PES 2019 and Gears of War. I am ok at Forza Horizon 4 and I will keep grinding. Holy shit I am at work and my body and mind don't want to be here. I just go to say fuck you body mind and soul and grind this shit out holy fuck it sucks.