Yesterday Ralph at work wrote a nice message for me. He wrote on a website that lets oter people know about people who are working hard. It said something like "Ray is always looking to get better and he emails and talks about getting better all the time. I put my work and my actions into getting better every day.
There was a sale yesterday that was goofy. There was a man making me uncomfortable, I just wanted to leave him alone, but I told myself the reason why I am good at sales is because I sell to everyone and I don't want to open that pandora's box of not selling to someone. I want to sell to everyone to always gain experience and to keep my skills up. I went through it and then I wrote it down and told myself I need to blog about selling to people like this because I really take pride in pitching sales to the unpitchable. I have a 100% offer rate for my sales and that is something I have always worked on as a comedian, talking to girls, or in sales. I strive to not let someone else change my actions or my thoughts.
After I met with Raymond today I struggled with boredom all day. Nothing sounded good. I got bioshock infinaty from the library but it didn't work. It was a struggle. I went for several drives and I just told myself "treat this like dad would a boat ride" so I drove around until I got bored. I won't have many boring days coming up I work Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. I am helping Matt the engineer move on Saturday. The boredom was pretty bad today though, worse than it normally is. I wish I could find something that is simple and makes me feel good quickly when I am bored, but I have to take showers, go for walks, go for drives etc to just pass the time. That is just the way my life is. I am either sick or too high or too low emotionally, or when I am just right I am bored haha.
I did put on some music and clean my room. I put on summer breeze by seals and croft and that helped me relax and get some dusting done.
Andrea is talking to me again after I agreed that me snapping at her is my fault and we agreed that I need to be more joyful when doing things with her and her family. All My life and especially my adult life after college I did what I wanted to do all the time. I am starting to change as a core person and help others and it is hard. I remember something "THE ELDERSTATESMAN" said...he said the thing Monks have trouble with is to do what someone else wants them to do. Anyway my boredom is passing and the stress from the boredom is passing right now so that is good.
When I moved down to Lenexa I had to drive back to St. Joseph to drink with Matt. He was my only friend that would hang out with me, eventually I moved in with Dave and we hung out some, but not much. I just drank a ton to escape and feel good, but it was very lonely. Today I have deep relationships with The Byrdman, My parents, My sister, Raymond, Matt the engineer, SGT MATT, Kurtis, Andrea, John Mexican Nacho Libre, V-Foundation, Cody V, and many more. As I look at the picture from the campsite I can see 15 or so people that if I died today at-least they would be aware of my death. So that makes me feel good. I always wanted my legacy to be a guy that was fat and felt sorry for himself, and decided to take responsibility for himself to get skinny and stop being such a victim. I think the fact that I have so many friends is a tribute to hard work and working day in and day out to be more of a people person.
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