11/21/2016

Today I woke up and I walked a couple miles on the treadmill. I went to an AA meeting. I came home and rested. I went to work and I am competing in a weight loss challenge at work. I got weighed in there and I did pretty well I didn't win. I did win a hy-vee gift card for dropping 3 pounds in a week. A win is a win! I was out working and I noticed I messed up on one paper work on a bag. The kind of mistake that put me on probation longer than expected. I immediately get scared for my job. I just have to remember that it is just fear and that fear won't kill me. I guess I messed up on a couple more things because a guy was ragging on me just asking if I had a bad night on Friday. The truth is it is hard to work overtime when you have depression. It is hard to focus for long periods of time. I got 2 piece lists and 6 batches done which isn't good either. So overall this day was a D if we were scoring it A-F like a report card. The only thing keeping it from being an F is I didn't have an impact on my forklift and no one got hurt. I feel pretty good right now though. I just have to remember a part of my brain wants to keep me in fear and keep me depressed I just have to accept that for what it is and go about my business the best I can.