06/15/2016

My mood today would be a 7 out of 10. It would be better but I was a bit squirlly most of the morning. I did go for a walk. I plan on hitting up planet fitness on Thursday. Reading about depression I can think of 3 things that usually trigger my depression. Loss of a job. Loss of a girlfriend or a girl I really like rejects me. Long periods of loneliness. I have hope that I don't fall back into deep depression, but if I do I know what to do. The lady I was seeing in Lawrence chuckled because I was pissed that everyone told me to "Get sunlight" when I was depressed. She was like people with depression been through it before they know all about it. It is life for them. They don't need advice they just need patience. That made sense to me because I have had periods of deep deperession 3 times in my life. Once my freshman year of college. Triggered by being alone all my friends left, no girlfriend, no job. It was a bad time. Somewhere around 08 I was in a deep depression then in 2010 but in 2010 I got through it pretty fast. Then in 15 and again in 16 with 16 being seemingly the most productive. Getting actual help being o.k. with how I am feeling and knowing that it will pass was pretty freeing and I can look back at the 16 depression as a positive. The other ones seem pretty worthless haha. Switching gears. I don't really feel proud or anything but it is worth noting that I talked to 50 people a day at call centers and made people laugh and provided a good experience when I worked there. The amount of people who came in contact with me is in the 10,000 and I can safely say that I used humor and empathy to my best of my ability to try to help people. For that I will give myself 10 dorito's.