A's

The A's had a blockbuster deal. Their rotation is sick, but they gave away an awesome power hitter. That trade left me all like...OH WOW!

Thursday

Thursday I woke up and washed my blankets and washed some clothes. I am chatting with Jason as we speak. We are grateful that we aren't living in a dangerous place...like 3rd world country...or St. Joseph. I am ranked #2 in my department at work, which is good. I am glad I am pretty high, it would be sweet to be #1, but I am not going to stress out, and yesterday was a bad night for sales so I may have dropped. I was always in trouble at my old job, I am glad I don't just dread going to work and have written warnings and things like that. I went for a small walk today, and I met with Raymond. I also get deep level life coaching with Raymond. He also had a giant spider on his wall which was creepy. My dad is going to give Bryce the business.

Wednesday

Oh yeah. Waking up to watch Hercules. It isn't a serious take as I expected. Very tongue in cheek with plenty of action. The rocks arms remind me of mine! Byrd bought a jeep just like mine. I always knew I was a trend setter.

Random

I went to go see Planet of the Apes. Working nights means I can watch movies for 5 dollars. Some kids asked me to watch a movie with them because they needed someone to be 21. That was really random and I am sad to say that I had a debate with myself because hey free movie!

Sporting Kansas City. They won on the road down a man...not just any many, but BEASTler
That means Besler by the way. Great win against Toronto FC. The Royals are back in action tonight.

At work I am looking to finish out July strong. We won't bonus this Month, but I have been ranked 2-9th out of 82. This is good and if I am in the top half I will be cool with that. Also if I don't recieve any bad feedback. I have to remember to ask my supervisor to pull some calls on new accounts because I just finished my training. It is important to me to do whatever it takes to succeed. That takes some fears away from me that I know I am doing everything I can to get ever tidbit of success out of my life. Also it helps take away fears when things go bad because I knew I could do whatever I could do.


Andrea said she was feeling down yesterday, which I can relate too. As long as I don't buy a dog or a new car in a down mood to fix the situation I am doing good. So much of life is making down situations into a positive learning experience. Or just making "Not messing things up" a habit. Every time you are feeling down and you don't make things worse, or you reach out for help, it creates a habit and a culture of learning. That makes your life better when your mood comes back around. I think alot of it has to do with Mondays are stressful and bring your mood down.

Anyway some goals are to finish #1 in the department.
To do my best and to do the right things to the best of my knowledge in all situations.
To write down what I eat and the amount.
To be loving to all.
To be awesome!

Monday

I went to an AA meeting today. It was o.k. Sometimes I get tired of people saying the same stuff over and over again, but like the bench press some advice and some mental excersises are timeless.

I have been playing The Sims 2...and this happened. I created Andrea and I in a house, and it wouldn't let me control her, so she didn't go to the bathroom on time and died. She became a ghost and haunted people. When I went to work as a mascot I could control her character. The Grim Reeper showed up and I paid him 200 dollars to bring Andrea back to life.

Sunday

Sunday I woke up and ate some sausages. They were grilled and they were good. I was reflecting on a long weekend with Andrea. On Friday we drove around and she bought a new car. I was exhausted (Pun intended). Saturday Andrea and I went to a birthday party for her nephew Titus. He turned 4 and there was free pizza. This was awesome because there was free pizza. I ate everything every made.

Random fact. I bought the Sims part 1 and I lost it in the street somewhere. Now I bought the sims part 1 again and it doesn't work. Arg.

I bought the sims part 2 and it does work. My guy is going to beast in this game.

I am grateful Andrea and I could go to Titus's birthday party and not completely be a screwed up couple. I know lots of couples out there would be drunk and have arrest warrents or have drama, but we showed up and Andrea ate a sandwich and it was all good. I am sure Nate and his wife were cool with the fact we didn't show up drunk, or high, or with some kind of drama. We also were wearing clean clothes and weren't dropped off by a cab. That is progress right there folks!

I am grateful for free pizza from papa johns
I am grateful for Rice Crispy treats.

Sporting KC and Manchester City

Sporting KC lost badly to Manchester FC no surprise. It is the English premiers pre season. Manchester united Beat the LA galaxy 7-0! Come on LA make the MLS look respectable.

Poker night is cancelled

No interest in anyone for poker night. I am ranked 9th in my company, but our company surveys are too low so I still won't get a bonus. Hung out with Andrea yesterday. She got cable and I watched 2 (2???!!!!) innings of Royals baseball yesterday. I was grateful to watch white hot Royals action since I can't catch them working nights. I was able to walk a bit and swim a bit. I went to wal-mart and Andrea tried to buy Butt Paste.

Blogging

Royals are terrible. Sporting Kc is awesome. Went to work today it was o.k. went to an A.A. meeting. I went for a swim it was ok. I got water everywhere going for a swim. It was hot as heck.

Sunday night

I am taking in a San Jose Earthquakes game vs. Red Bulls. I was able to go swimming at 24 hour fitness. I couldn't find which towel was mine, then I saw the one with the Hot Wing Sauce on it.

Sunday

Sunday I did some laundry. I was slightly upset because I ran out of money on my Laundry card and I had to go to a laundrymat. Andrea made me some chicken, strawberrys, cottage cheese, cashews, pickles, and spinich salad. It sounds rather strange but it was a good mix. Oh man I had some off the chain wings yesterday at "The Escape" Royals are terrible ya'll.

the weekend

Friday I was really tired. I grabbed my stuff and went to Andrea's she hit a late AA meeting and we tried to sleep outside. There was weird stuff going on outside. Saturday we celebrated my sisters birthday. Andrea and I went on a road trip. It was good. Andrea and I got a card for my sister and a book of animals. My sister seemed to have a good time. Sunday I woke up and we crushed out a long walk. This week was one full of classtime candy and caffeine. I know it is hard work just staying employed. I am looking forward to getting on later shift and not being so busy on the streets. Sporting KC looks really good. Royals look like crap.

Thursday

Thursday training was long. Back on the phones tomorrow. Won at poker. Bryce, Jason, and Molly played. I had some laughs but didn't play for long.

Day 3 of training

Training day 3 wow. It is really tough to stay present. I make sure that I do my best to eat a bunch of sugar and do what it takes to pay attention. I went for a small walk. I went to an AA meeting. Talked to Raymond. It was a great day including with a great win for Sporting KC winning in the last second by a goal by Benny Feilhaber.

Tuesday

Tuesday I was in training. I went to Andrea's after work. We went for a really long walk. It was nice out and it is nice not to be drunk and hungover to really crush out a walk like that took some time and energy. I feel good right now and I hope you feel good as well.

Monday

Monday I went to work and training. It went alright. I ate tons of candy and drank a red bull because I was falling asleep every couple hours. I made it through. Tomorrow more of the same thing. I have to put my effort into getting there on time and trying my hardest to learn.

Saturday and Sunday

Saturday I went for a walk and I did laundry. I went shopping for food and played poker. I had lots of laughs with the guys playing poker. Sporting KC won and the Royals lost. On Sunday I was with Andrea and we went and visited my parents. I got my TV and soundbar. I am trying to get a room that can be comfortable for me at Andrea's because I get in a bad mood because I have no toys for me to play with and Andrea puts me to work. We got a giant shake at Winsteads and it was very good and very large. They sang a song or something.

I went home because I really want to focus on getting some sleep. I have an important week of training and to help my peace of mind I want to make sure I have my clothes ready, my alarm ready, my mind ready. I want to make sure I get prepared as much as I can to learn and be of service. My goals are to be on time and really do everything I can to pay attention, ask questions when I need to and be prepared. I hate it when I come away from training feeling like I could have done more to learn.

I felt good most of the weekend because life is good. My meds seem to be working, Andrea has gotten better with her mind making it easier on my life, my parents made it safe back from the ocean, and I get along with my roomates.

Thursday

Thursday was O.K. I was rated 6th still in my department. I expect to drop to mid-pack because I had to close some accounts. I have good first call resolution and good sales. I am working hard. My approach is to take it one day at a time. Next week I am going to really have to worry about one day at a time. I have training which I have to be on my game to really pay attention. Tomorrow is pay day or as I like to be called "Being sorely dissapointed day" I am glad I was able to meet with Raymond today. He brightens my day and I have gotten used to meeting him without so much anxiety. He loves God. He always trys to be better and more loving. I hope I am calm and I am able to help people like he does one day. I know that me quitting drinking and me hitting A.A. really hard has helped people. I have been counting calories as of late and it has helped me from eating so much that I make myself sick. It is hard to not snack and I try to keep myself busy by doing small cleaning or reading. I have been eating candy, but counting calories. Anyway the last couple months I know Byrdman said I lost weight and I had one comment from Adam that I lost weight, so I know if I plan my meals out and work out and don't just give up I can keep my weight decent. I know I get treated with my respect if I am in range of my ideal weight. I was able to log into SoberRecovery.com today and say some words about Lexipro. Lexipro has helped me wake up and not have anxiety. I hope my mom and dad are having fun on their cruise. I know how hard they worked. I know my mom would be up late grading papers and then be up to early to take me to school. I loved waffles and sportscenter when I was young. I had some issues with food growing up eating until I was sick, so I am glad that I atleast am able to grow with not eating until I am sick now.


Gratitude List. I am Grateful for Andrea she is fun and she provides shelter and doesn't yell at me when I forget the fan on. Also she buys me delicious chicken and clothes.

I am grateful for my parents. They provided me money and shelter and I was ungrateful growing up, but I always had a nintindo and super nintindo to play. Even a playstation. and Computers. I always had the best things and I have great memories of the cool toys growing up.

I am grateful for A.A. When I decided to stop partying I had a place to go with a plan and lifestyle set out that I could follow that kept me from relapsing.

I am grateful for mp3's about meeting girls and improving yourself. Tony Robbins, David deangelo, Zig Ziggler they had great shows and tapes about improving my mind. It gave me hope and it provided me so much happiness listening to how pumped up those people got about improving themselves.

I am grateful for Kurtis, we went out and we met people, we got rejected, we learned how to handle rejection. Kurtins and I went deep into Social Game and how to vibe with cool people in social sitations. I suck with people but I strive every day to treat people with respect, be aware of peoples feelings, and help people.

I am grateful for God, Jesus, and all the people who serve others. I am grateful for the U.S.A. my grandparents, hot showers, hot food, long john silvers, teachers, missouri western, sporting kc, Royals, Chiefs, Mavericks, Penguins, Pacers, Nascar, Dale Earnhardt j.r.

I am grateful for Byrdman. He is always cool to everyone and easy going. He is a great person and with is new kid he has grown lots. I actually saw the growth the way he was describing dogs. His brother is also a great man who has trudged a tough road to manhood.

I am grateful for a bed to sleep in. The pope sleeps on the floor once a week to stay humble. I am cool with sleeping in my bed.

Thursday

Thursday ment it was time to visit Raymond and talk about how selfish I am. He talked about how awesome his time at the lake was during the holiday. I talked about Salvador Perez's big 3 run homerun yesterday. DRAMA. Sporting KC's goalie ruined his hand. I have my doubts that SKC will get into the playoffs this year. They really need Besler, Zusi, and the backup goal keeper to do some work down the stretch.

Yesterday I got a peek at this months stats. I figured I would be mid-pack at best, but I was 5th overall. I have been selling decently and my ability to have people taken care of the first time they call has paid dividends. I had to close an account yesterday which will drop me down. I have training next week and I need to be on my game to be able to learn more things overall I have been happy and blessed to be out of jail and to be able to hold a job for more than a month. I strive to work hard and be patient with people.

Wednesday

Yesterday I went to work. I got off early so I went to Andrea's. We watched The Office. The dog ran away and Andrea chased K-So down. I watched some soccer and went to sleep. I didn't drink which is cool. I am glad I don't have Jail issues today. I just read an article that 95 percent of the males on earth are in jail. Whew...glad I am not that 95 percent! I also have running water! That is awesome!

Tuesday

I woke up and went for a walk. I went to the library there were tons of kinds there. Nothing interested me. I played video poker on my phone and got a straight flush which is rare. Getting ready to go to work. Thankful for clothes to cover my body and I am grateful I don't live in a place where I could be attached by wild animals. Thankful to not be in jail today and thankful for no storm damage from the storms yesterday.

Sunday

Sunday Andrea and I went to an AA meeting. There is no better and powerful way for us to make ourselves better than to go to an AA meeting and tell how we are handling life without boozing it up. After that Molly and Laura took me to sporting kc game. Dom Dwyer was beasting and got a yellow card after taking a self picture scoring a goal. I made an MS paint picture to commemorate the event. I uploaded a picture of myself water skiing. Sporting KC tied and it was very hot out. I ate fried pickles and a cobb salad from Hooters. I stayed under 2000 calories for the day. At night Andrea and I enjoyed playing video games and we enjoyed her deck that she worked so hard to get built. Then the chickens came over and pooped all over my jeep.

Monday I can already feel myself crashing because I felt good most of yesterday. I know this is what Mondays do to people and I try to keep a good attitude about it. After having a high yesterday of feeling good and screaming and laughing at the Sporting KC game I know Mondays emotions are going to be way lower than that.

July 5th

Woke up grateful that I kept my body in decent enough shape to go skiing yesterday. There are lots of people eating candy right now sitting on their behind just trying to scrape by not able to go water skiing. So thank you "Past me!"

July 3rd and july 4th

311 was good. Poker went good. I think Jason went all-in and won. I was sick as hell on July 4th. Long car rides with winding roads and boat rides with waves..too much. Ugh. Came and threw up all night. Andrea is a really good knee border. I was able to ski for the first time in a long time and I got up right away. Those VHS's and training SKI's my dad bought really helped me out.

I am still dizzy right now from being sick all day, but I was able to go for 2 mile walk. This 4th of July I will remember for being sick and the beautiful weather.

3rd of july

I went for a two-mile walk today. It was beautiful out. I loaded up my zune and phone with a decent playlist. I have been listening to lots of The Police lately. I haven't gone deep in their collection, just the hits. I deposited some money to the bank. My general theme for today is "get by with less" and "be smart" I always want to buy crap I don't need and be a real jerk. I just am trying to enjoy my day but not come home with a bunch of crap I don't need. Andrea came over yesterday, we watched some HGTV. She likes to complain while watching, but I make sure to let her know when she pays for cable she can complain all that she wants. You know how the saying goes. Don't buy the hand that feeds to HGTV. Work is going o.k. I have 5 sales so far. I wanted to be team captain and I put in for it, but my friend Ralph got it. I even brought candy bars as bribes. I got more votes than I thought I would get. Ralph is a dude at work a couple years older than me, good head on his shoulders good worker. My friend Keith is a younger guy he really has a knock for working hard and selling. Aaron of course is my supervisor and his calling card is positive no matter what. Positive about everything.

I think that is it for today. I am glad I didn't wake up with a hang over today. I actually had enough energy to give Andrea chocolate and coffee. It wasn't quite roses and a box of chocolate, but hey I am from st joseph, she is lucky I didn't give her cigerettes and a rottwiler.

Long walk

I was able to go for a two mile walk today. This makes me feel good because I always try to hammer out walks and eating decently. I have been eating pretty crappy but I do eat veggies and fruit. Anyway I know I only have two or three things or skills I want to hammer on in a lifetime. Taking care of my body is one, my mind is two, not drinking is two, and being patience with people is two....wait...did I say two a whole bunch? I probably drank too much.

This next essay is about when I was in a bad mood on Sunday what would have happened if I drank that day. I would have gotten all drunk yelled and pushed my girlfriend around. Then headed to the bar...I would have ran up a 50 dollar tap before starting a fight. I would have gotten my butt kicked and sent to jail. Broken glasses/cell phone/angry girlfriend. Bailed out of jail on my credit card probably...then put my glasses cell phone and roses on my credit card...at a 22.99 apr the interest would have gathered lots of dollars and I would have put up with a crapload of emotional crazyness while I try to get through the day explaining why my glasses are taped up and why there is a boot mark on my head..

Instead I didn't drink and I just told people I am in a bad mood, let me play Double Dragon and leave me alone.

Wednesday

I had a decent night at work yesterday. One man asked me how long I have been in customer service. I explained I worked at Blockbuster for 5 years and I worked at insurance company for 7, and now I work at this new place. I strive to understand people have have patience and empathy people. He then explained "Whoa buddy I don't need your entire life story!" then he hung up.

I didn't owe any interest on my Amazon card this month which makes me think I paid my entire balance from the previous statment without knowing. Sometimes I will pay 100 twice in the same period and even though in my mind I am carrying a balance I actually paid the entire in the previous period.

Lets say my bill is 200 dollars and I get it and I pay a 100 dollars right away

so in my mind I am carrying a 100 dollar balance.

then I use the card more and run it back up to 200 dollars again

then pay another 100 dollars...at the billing date in my mind I think I am carrying 100 balance and I should be charged interest. But actually I paid off the entire 200 dollars from the previous billing statement so I don't have any interest and the 100 dollars I charged is going on the next billing statement.

I am a nerd yes I know.

I bought a card shuffler off of amazon and it is a pile of crap that throws the card everywhere. I get a good laugh out of it at poker night because it is awful. I was thinking we could use it to have people not cheat or something, but it is truly bad. It cost me amazon points and it cost me 3 bucks. I guess I am trying to get 20 jokes out if it or something.

I changed my address on my vanguard retirement website. I recieved a nastygram telling me to update my address. It was nice to see my 1325 dollars worth in retirement. Can't wait until I roll in that money when I am at retirement age like Scrooge Mcduck.

gratitude list.

I am grateful and thankful I saw the USA mens team play at sporting park. It was a great run and I think soccer in this country is taking a step forward. Now zusi and besler please get rested to save Sporting KC please.

I am grateful for Andrea. She has been goofy lately and I need to be more goofy as well. In improv they always say "don't say no to a joke you have to keep the all rolling" lots of times I am in a pissy mood and I say no to her jokes. Need to work on keeping the good times rolling.

I am grateful for my job, the gym, soccer, baseball, my parents, my parents work ethic, my parents religious ethic? My grandparents, my jeep, my liver, my brain, my college, and of course the Lenexa police department for keeping me from getting shot at by criminals.

Two sales.

Two sales went for a walk after work. Did a good job with people on the phone. People like my effort to have a good tone of voice and I make sure I show as much as I can I appreciate customers.

New month new goals

Yesterday I finished out the month 6th overall in my company. That is sales/quality/compliance/account retention. I should be proud of that number because that is 94% better than everyone else in the company. I am pretty bla about it right now. It is time to start thinking about how I want to handle this month. Account retention....I need to listen to my supervisor....I need to be positive....I need to sale obviously....I want to be #1 I will do whatever it takes to be #1 and it starts today. I felt good yesterday finishing out the month. I was able to take every customer and write out how patient I was with them. I try to do whatever in my power to help the customer and do the right thing, even sometimes when it hurts my stats. I got 12 reviews last month with people doing a survey of how I was and all twelve gave me 100% This is somewhat an outlier because there is sometimes people that are mad and just give the customer service rep a zero because they are angry, but I won't look a gift horse in the mouth and I will take the score of 100% as a good sign of me really working hard to be a good employee and grow in my patience and empathy with people. I can always work on my skills as a salesman, I can work on finishing peoples needs to have them not call the call center back, I can continue to have empathy and patience with myself and people. On every interaction I know how important it is to let people know that they are value-able, that they are listened too, that we are working on getting better, and that we strive on building a good customer and business relationship so we both win. My approach is to have every interaction through my day be a professional interaction with patience, empathy and kindness and I know if I can do that consistantly I will be fine. I know that it is easy when I feel good but tough when I am tired and frustrated. That is why it is important to ask for God's help when times get tough and it is important to grow my work ethic so when I am tired and frustrated I can focus in on kindness, being professional, and making sure people get taken care of.